The Preacher's Pen

Recently I saw a list of questions to ask before you complain to church leaders (Cathy Miller, May-June 1998, DiscipleshipJournal). With a little adaptation of her original ideas I present you with seven questions to think about:

1. Am I the problem? Could it be that I just wish others to conform to me or do to suit me? Am I just being self-centered and wanting my own way?

2. What is my real motive in wanting to complain? Impure motives include wanting to be noticed, getting your own way, blaming others and making others look bad. Right motives come from love and prayer, glorifying God rather than self (1 Cor. 13:4-6).

3. Am I being humble, gentle, patient, and bearing with others in love? Step back and look at yourself from God's perspective (Eph. 4:1-3).

4. Am I genuinely interested in submitting to the church's elders? Could it be that I am demanding things be done my way, in my time? Beware! Your complaint may be little more than a disguised case of rebellion (Heb. 13:17).

5. Am I demanding others be perfect, a standard I would never apply to myself? Read over Matthew 7:12 before complaining to others. How would I feel if people brought this kind of complaint to the elders about me?

6. Can I state my complaint in the form of a constructive suggestion rather than a criticism? Be helpful, not hurtful (Col. 3:12-14).

7. Am I willing to be part of the solution? Your willingness to help solve the problem gives validity to your recommendations. Backup your words with actions (James 1:23-25).

I hope you will think of these before you complain. A large number of church problems could be averted if we would only search our hearts before attacking others. Think carefully, examine yourself and pray before complaining!